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Thread: Review Anything

  1. #1
    Moderator Les Zeppelin's Avatar
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    Default Review Anything

    I liked reading the reviews in the House Of Vans thread, and we should do more of them.

    Review anything - your new deck, Homes Under The Hammer, your last wank...anything.
    Quote Originally Posted by Spanky View Post
    Unnamed skateboard companies, patios, Alan Shearer, Ric Flair, Palace, patios again, Scrooge McDuck, Jimmy Saville and a Jack the Ripper conspiracy, proper use of apostrophes, Stu Forder, anon's short Mills & Boon writing career, Rye wanking in a cupboard, repressed freestylers and finally Les Zeppelin's short intro to a romance novel.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    Time to post this classic.

    No, I have no idea whatsoever about the wheres or whys but humour....



  3. #3
    Ultra King FixationOnPlastics's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    My favourite cup:my favourite cup has a print of a simplistic watercolour painting of a cow in a field backed by streaky blue sky. I only drink tea out of this cup. This cup is the best because tea tastes better out of it than from any other cup. They only draw back to this cup is that it is small. a bigger cup would mean I could have more delicious tea.

    The End.
    Tanks are called tanks because when they move the sound they make is 'tank tank tank tank tank'

  4. #4
    ▄bermensch seismic egg's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    Review for: Kirstie's Fill your house for free. Channel 4.

    DIE! you fucking morons.

  5. #5
    ▄bermensch seismic egg's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    I love that Sidewalk kid. You should find him and get a interview for the mag. Doubt he's still skating though.

  6. #6
    Ultra King FixationOnPlastics's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    He looks like Volst.
    Tanks are called tanks because when they move the sound they make is 'tank tank tank tank tank'

  7. #7
    ▄bermensch Load's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    Quote Originally Posted by FixationOnPlastics View Post
    My favourite cup:my favourite cup has a print of a simplistic watercolour painting of a cow in a field backed by streaky blue sky. I only drink tea out of this cup. This cup is the best because tea tastes better out of it than from any other cup. They only draw back to this cup is that it is small. a bigger cup would mean I could have more delicious tea.

    The End.
    Could I please borrow your cup for a week?

  8. #8
    Ultra King FixationOnPlastics's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    No. Get your own cup with a simplistic watercolour painting of a cow in a field backed by streaky blue sky.
    Tanks are called tanks because when they move the sound they make is 'tank tank tank tank tank'

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    Tube journey this morning:

    I slept in later than I should so it meant I had to miss breakfast and brush through everyone (yeah, I'm one of those people in the morning, soz). I entered the tube about 1/3 down the train as I know exactly which exit the Victoria line connects to the central line. On the tube I saw a wide variety of people of all shapes and sizes. One man had a really nice brown cord jacket. Another man was wearing extremely large glasses, but his suit was so pimp that he pulled them off. The lack of stupid facial hair assisted in confirming this sentiment. There was a considerable paucity of graffiti and stickers within the carriage, although one young gentleman had a badge on his bag suggesting he was against nazis as the badge delineated a stick-man throwing a swastika in a bin. The journey lasted all of 6 minutes without any real delays. However, at Green Park one man halted the journey because his bag got stuck in the door.

    The central line going eastbound was much the same, although contained considerably more suited men.

    Would definitely recommend using this mode of transport.
    Which one is greater, Sun or Moon?

    The answer is The Moon because Sun shines in the day when there is already light available. But moon shines in the night when there is no light.





  10. #10
    Moderator hugo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything




    KA Black grape drink.

    Bright purple in colour, medium clarity, high in bubbles.
    On the nose you will get hints of blackcurrent and fizzy bubblegum bottle sweets.
    The taste is very sweet, but the bubbles take the edge off. There is a good length.

    Best mixed with rum and eaten alongside curried goat.
    Quote Originally Posted by weed View Post
    im not a racist you just look like a potato

  11. #11
    ▄bermensch telmernatorx's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    where can i get a curried goat, and can you review that so i know in advance if i want one? i like goats and might get a live one one day for my garden, mainly and it will fuck my dogs head up dealing with a goat.

  12. #12
    Ultra King FixationOnPlastics's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    A review of Smurph's review of his tube journey:

    It is a well crafted story that utilizes a 1st person narrative to whisk the reader away on a journey of underground tunnels, the diversity of the human form and antifascist rebellion All set against the backdrop of a classic race against time. The use of language is sublime and really captures his sense of wonder even in the face of drab urban mundanity.
    On top of all of this, I was not prepared for the Shyamalan esque twist at the end. You'll get no spoilers from me though.

    A rollicking good read.
    Tanks are called tanks because when they move the sound they make is 'tank tank tank tank tank'

  13. #13
    Ultra King voodoo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    Quote Originally Posted by telmernatorx View Post
    where can i get a curried goat, and can you review that so i know in advance if i want one? i like goats and might get a live one one day for my garden, mainly and it will fuck my dogs head up dealing with a goat.


    Need.

  14. #14
    Moderator hugo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    In the summer i'd probably not have it with rice and sauce which is traditional.

    So here is my summer goat recipe.

    Get some diced goat shoulder and season with this.



    Put seasoned goat on skewers with red onion, peppers, chillies and mushrooms.

    Shake some of this over the top.




    Wack it under the grill or BBQ.

    Wash down with KA Black grape and Mount Gay rum.
    Quote Originally Posted by weed View Post
    im not a racist you just look like a potato

  15. #15
    ▄bermensch telmernatorx's Avatar
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    Default Re: Review Anything

    haha, why do they pass out i have no sound here? too funny

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